c r e a t i v e a g a i n
02 april 2026 dharamsala, india
as a child, i loved painting freely without thinking about what something should look like. i remember drawing my toys, faces, bodies, dresses, and little imaginary worlds on paper. looking back, i think i even enjoyed painting them more than actually playing with them.
and maybe that is the beauty of how children create. how freely they express themselves. how naturally they bring their inner world to life, simply because their minds are not yet as loud as those of adults.
they do not stop to wonder whether something is good or bad, they simply express what lives within them.
the older i became, the more i slowly lost this intuitive connection to creativity. especially through school, where we often learn not to create freely, but to follow instructions, rules, and expectations. suddenly, creativity became something to compare, evaluate, and perfect. i remember thinking that i could not really paint because my paintings looked different from everyone else's. when in reality, that is exactly what makes creative expression so beautiful. without even realizing it, i slowly drifted away from something that had once felt completely natural.
for a long time, my creativity existed only in little sketches between my university notes or on the pages of my journals. years later, during the pandemic, while living in a shared apartment in freiburg, i slowly found my way back to painting. i began drawing naked bodies, abstract faces, emotions, and forms and while painting, i realized how deeply i had missed that feeling: the feeling of losing track of time and of becoming quiet inside, the feeling of simply expressing instead of constantly thinking.
for a long time, i dreamed of painting freely on large canvases. without a plan. without rules. without a specific technique or a finished image in mind.
but first, there was always fear.
what if it doesn't look beautiful?
what if i'm not talented enough?
what if i don't know what i'm doing?
and then, on the first day of 2025, something deep inside me quietly said: just begin.
so i went to an art store, bought my first canvas, and started painting without thinking too much. that was the day creative explosion was born. and immediately, something felt right.
since then, painting has become a form of meditation for me. a space where i lose track of time and become completely absorbed in the present moment. a space where i express emotions, process experiences, let energy flow, and reconnect with the parts of myself for which words are often not enough.
what i love most about abstract painting is that there is no right or wrong. no clear beginning and no definite end. no fixed perspective.
every person sees something different in the same painting.
and maybe we never had to learn creativity, maybe it was never gone, maybe it was simply waiting for us to find our way back to it.
